Collected by Volume 120 juniors.

• “He was waiting in the boys bathroom to get me today.”
• “She broke her spoon — that’s how hard she hit my back.”
• “I stalked her on Saturn to find her classes.” (Saturn is a new social media app.)
• “I got out 10 seconds after they sent the email :(“
• “I have a broken spoon in my bag, to remind me to do better next time”
• “I’m going to pretend I have to interview my target for The Record.” (It didn’t work.)
• “I will pay people off to get [my target’s] schedule. $1 now, $5 after I get him.” 
• “My target has a twin. That’s cheating.”
• “My spoon has a concealed carry permit.” (A teacher, in response) “It’s like a shiv in a prison shower… ready to strike.”
• (to the person trying to kill him) “20 bucks you leave me alone. And when I win we’ll  split the prize.”
• “I started crying when someone got me out because I was taking the game that seriously.”
• “Thank god I got out. Now I can actually breathe.